Defining onesself - Finding the Purpose in Life

During social gatherings, when the people I meet introduce themselves, most of them define themselves by their fancy job title, regardless of the fact whether they are truly passionate about their job or believe in it or not. Often, it has left me wondering who that person actually is. And I quickly get bored with them and  simply move on to the next. It is true that social community sites like Linkedin, Facebook, dating/matrimonial sites have made us define our profiles in the typical job, career, school, 'likes'- model, creating in us the belief that we are what our job is or the money we make, or what our relationship status is, or the community that we belong to.  And those who think they are that, they obviously will have nothing else going on in their life and believe that they are nothing more than that. No wonder they lose their sense of identity once they lose the very thing that 'defined' them.

'Just Red' by ©© Flickr/Nam Nguyen

Once I asked a few friends to find out and tell me what defines them, and what they stand for. Even after a month, none of them could come up with any answers! This is where profile filling columns of 'Couchsurfing', stand apart. It mostly focuses on what sets one apart and makes them unique, and a self-introspection on one's life. (At the least, their earlier version of the questionnaire was much more introspective, which I liked better, though complicated) To be honest, it took me 2 whole weeks to figure out the answers to all those questions!!

I believe that one must define oneself by what they believe in and what they do for realizing that. It means following your heart and being in sync with who you are; and aligning your life with it.

Although rare, I am sometimes asked by some curious minds - what is the purpose of my life, and why I do what I do. I believe that one must define oneself by what they believe in and what they do for realizing that. It means following your heart and being in sync with who you are; and aligning your life with it, whatever your job may be. If you can create a career out of it, well then that is totally great. It's just that it shouldn't be your job (unless that's what you believe in or is passionate about) or paycheck or social status, where or whom you belong with, be the one defining you. That's why they say that you must be passionate about something, and passionate enough to follow it. And that is where one finds meaning in themselves, and in their life and purpose. Let it be any activity or a cause you care for; just stand for it and do something about it. Let that be your definition; because that's where true happiness lies.

Are choices made for the right reasons?

Often we hear people saying, ‘ I did not have a choice’, regarding some choices made in their life without realizing that there was also a choice to choose ‘nothing’ when they were conflicted with choices or did not have a choice of their liking. Well, whatever choice we choose or don’t choose, those are still choices and we choose them for the ‘reasons’ that we believe are ‘right’ or it is the universally accepted right or simply because, it is what we think we want.

'Freedom of Choice' by ©© Flickr/Geeta Nambiar 

Now, in the case of choices made based on reasons, are the choices we choose made for the ‘right’ reasons? And if we believe we make choices for the right reasons, what exactly is then the ‘right’ reason? How do we call a reason the right one or what makes a reason ‘right’?

Think of any choice taken in life which you believed was the right one. Usually, these ‘rights’ are decided against the universally, societal or personally benchmarked rights and reasons. Now, for whatever reasons you made the choice, was it what you had really wanted and/or were you really happy with that choice? I am not talking about the cons of the choice you made and whether you were happy with it or not, since each choice has its own pros and cons and these we accept as we go ahead with the choice. This is about the choice itself that you made. When you decided to go ahead with that choice, where you really happy and content with it and, more importantly, was that what you had really wanted or, more specifically, needed?